I had to live, walk, eat, sleep, brush my teeth a million times ; breathe, laugh, sigh, weep,scratch, yell,jump, grieve,dance, die, arise, live, fall, sweep, jump steep then, only realise, I needn’t listen to Marty, Pinky, or Mr.Lokasinji, and what they say about me –
we are ( yes, you) infinite/ spirit/ human/zillion miles of nerves and twists and curls inside, and all this we write, or chat or do with for each other/ self, matters, sweet Maya, it matters more than what we know just yet,
and I should know by now, we are still in this University called Life, you and I, Professors of Duh – maybe, but we are infinite, not little pyres of coal and boxes of crumply bones, this is more than a temporary arrangement. Deep sigh.
Infinite – Temporaries.
Which makes it easier to understand why Dana SW smiled that way when she passed on, or how Mora can take terminal illness the way he does ;
it also scares me : that it leaves a responsibility to behave, even just a bit, when YOU are not around. Sheka JH. asked last night what’s the matter with me (me) and Why I cannot write normal posts about goats and lovesongs, or basic good natured movies and songs. Why go into meta- physical abnormal for pity’s sakes, you’re killing mu sleep, forever reminding of some stuff I never even knew in the first place. You’re a mad woman, he said to me, on chat, and I could hate you, if I didn’t think you meant well. So just shut up and go to sleep, or snack, or watch a nice movie like the latest take on Holly wood’s Snow White.
So, I did that, and they’re saying the same thing ; every blinking person that’s writing, or scripting, or tele-vising is going into Abnormal Psyche. I watched all the Shreks, Ice Ages, Men in Black, Transporters and Spiders – also Bats. Every single body is yelling to know if they are just some recycled paper mash monkey or what.
What am saying is, Sheka JH, we have a responsibility to behave well towards dogs, man, women, fellow-people, and fish tanks. Also fellow travellers. Do NOT ride on their toes. say sorry of you do.
See, I just had a great Sunday morning with hot idlis and coffee. After years and years I learnt to fix Idlis :))) It was a sign, okay, however funny t’may sound here. Prayers were answered. Are answered, in ways more than we know. Because we are more than just paper-bags in a row, we have the right to ask questions, and be heard.
I prayed so hard about a few things, early this morning, I scared the clouds, the Gulmohar outside, and a few sparrows. As an answer, I was taught how to finally cook a batch of Idlis. My little son is still blind and a whole host of things still need repair. I can’t say here, but this I know.
There’s more to us than we designate, so respect us more, okay. And its’ not such a terrible thing to shut up and be grateful for ‘ tender mercies new every morning’, yeah okay it sounds old fashioned, never mind. I was served by angels this morning. The idli mix finally rose, they were no longer scud- missiles – capable of causing injury.
Why today, I don’t know. I was provoked, Sheka, 🙂 Thank you.
For reminding me that we are more than we know. More than we know.